Expect carelessly slung Tommy Hilfiger puffers they’d cry about if they lost it at Antwerp. Masochistic and self-pitying, why else would you go to university in Wales? ‘Remy, the ratatouille, the rat of all my dreams’, Videos show fireworks being let off and students have described the scene as ‘horrifying’, These memes have me laughing until I’m coffin, Finally a way to show I only go for toxic brown haired boys, If you leave your shower curtain closed, you’re done for. The purest of all the universities in the UK, UEA are well-known for their commitment to fancy dress: the LCR is a costumed mecca, and Pimp My Barrow is the most important event on their social calendar. During an interview for a law firm in Cyprus, I was interviewed by a man who was willing to hire me simply based on my looks and country of origin. That’s why the KCL campuses are so chock-a-block with nice winterwear and tortured frowns: because if you’re going to protest, you may as well do it in style. You laugh to yourself while scrolling through Facebook at all your basic home mates who are so unay it’s unbearable. At least there’s a beach. Eliminating gender discrimination in the foreseeable future is probably impossible. They are often used to make jokes. He didn’t even look at my CV. “Everyone wears a lot of tartan, drinks whisky and plays a shit load of lacrosse/polo.” – Marie-Elise, Sheffield. 2. What? “Basically every girl at Brookes is a fashion blogger with a great camera and jeans which hit at just the right part of their ankle. You’re in the middle of nowhere, where nothing can hear you but the trees – and you’re a bit of an oddball, so you like it like that. Wanderlust in human form, Sussex students look like they spend their days smoking spice and eating vegan and refusing to wash. The cold is so piercing that your body temperature never properly recovers. You were initially a bit bummed out that despite getting into Exeter uni you were going to be even further away from civilisation. There are too many shops on Princes Street and you will spend your entire student loan in one afternoon. Boyce House. Consistently in the upper middle of the league tables, they sit comfortably in clothes that would be best described as ‘safe’. If you don’t have good ball wear, you’re not going to survive. We love a geek at Unifresher so don’t necessarily see these tweets as an insult. By their final year, the Manchester student will have perfected the art of appearing effortless. You’re so boring that you chose York because of it’s collegiac system. The general trend seems to be, if you’re not … Docs, bowl haircuts, dungarees, shaved … You’re not stupid but you didn’t get in anywhere else. What does Will from The Inbetweeners know? Unfortunately for Leeds students, it would seem they’re pretty much universally perceived as being cooler-than-thou, edgy twats. Last but not least, of course, is your ability to party. Yes, on paper, Sheffield may not be the most exciting place to go to uni. What did you do to deserve this? Most infuriatingly, it makes them seem quite cool. It’s just the Bristol way. At least one university student has died every week since the start of term, This is where you recognise the cast of Netflix’s The Queen’s Gambit from. “Yes, I live in a townhouse in Islington, why is that relevant?”. Probably, yes, but you won’t look as good in your candid Instagram photos. Hey, Hector, Wigbert and Winnie. I write about university life and all things student-related. You have age-based targets that you WILL hit. Haymarket. While Sheffield certainly has a whole lot going for it, from its amazing nightlife to its ridiculously cool street art, it has a bit of a rep for people who go there being, well, twats. Everyone on Hes East has stacks of cash to be able to pay for those ensuite rooms. “Sussex students want everyone to know how peace and love they are, so they parade around in hippie festival hoodies in navajo print and brown vegan leather boots to match their aesthetic.” – Lucy, Cardiff. The university has apologised for the article, headlined “Add a degree of fashion to your graduation day”, which featured suggestions from the luxury department store Harvey Nichols. A mutual hate for the Glasgow Uni Wanker brings everyone together in a warm snuggly blanket. We conducted an exhaustive survey of UK students to bring you the definitive stereotypes of 30 of the UK’s biggest universities – then we illustrated them. Nottingham Trent University Stereotype How much truth is there to college stereotypes? Sean Ellis was 19 when he was found guilty, and now faces his fourth trial, ‘He passed out against my door’: We asked you for your ‘flatcest’ stories and oh my god, New Netflix horror film ‘His House’ currently has 100 per cent on Rotten Tomatoes, Four students kicked out of their halls because they broke uni Covid rules. Literally just a list of very well-observed stereotypes. Big, hairy blokes. What better way to get in the spooky spirit? 15. How much of it makes up who you really are? Unlike Brookes students, who can get away with saying “oh I go to university in Oxford” and hope they won’t be found out, everyone knows you’re not at the proper place – because Anglia Ruskin advertises everywhere. Oxford might be home to some of the brainiest students the country has to offer, but it seems that while its students excel in some areas, they are somewhat sartorially challenged… People are pointing out how badly Oxford students dress too often for it to be a coincidence, surely? UK University Student Stereotypes Which ones do you know of? They are Topman if Topman was a uni. It’s nice to be surrounded by people as intelligent as you for a change. Often city universities feel lumbered with their polytechnic cousin (seriously, ask a Leeds student about Beckett), but for you it’s the other way around. Hello. When you tell people where Northampton is you say it’s near Cambridge even though it’s equally near both Coventry and Milton Keynes. You like to pretend you’re at the University of Cambridge, but we all know it’s lies. Here we are again. It’s also very cold, there will be a lot of girls in knitted scarves with a starbucks. Which means the same clothes, but unwashed and full of holes.” – Greg, Cardiff, Blazers, chinos, red loafers and a signet ring as shiny as your floppy blonde hair.” – Daisy, Manchester, “Basically every girl at Brookes is a fashion blogger with a great camera and jeans which hit at, of their ankle.
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